Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for May 08, 2021

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    B UTTONS  over 3 years ago

    Too bad Wiz can’t do that with telephone solicitors.

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    wiatr  over 3 years ago

    Ha-ha!

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    oldpine52  over 3 years ago

    Back home we just kept big mean dogs for them.

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    eromlig  over 3 years ago

    We just ask them to salute the flag.

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    Wilde Bill  over 3 years ago

    You should see what the Wiz did to their bicycles.

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    TexTech  over 3 years ago

    Not sure what particular sect that is. Never seen any of them in blue jackets before.

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    Zykoic  over 3 years ago

    I tell them we practice Frisbeetarianism

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    A Common 'tator  over 3 years ago

    I love them… I’ll happily chat and discuss with them for hours… even came close to converting one couple to Judaism… Mine’s the one house they try to get away from…

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    LookingGlass Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I usually tell them that I’m an agnostic atheist then watch their eyes glaze over and their heads spin!!

    /SMIRK/

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    pauljmsn  over 3 years ago

    I’ve never had this come up. Pity. I’m an ordained minister in the Church of the Subgenius™. Talking to them about “Bob” would be interesting.

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    me_the_polish_gull  over 3 years ago

    Yes, salesmen can be annoying.

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    nosirrom  over 3 years ago

    And they decided to form a new sect. The Jumphova’s Witnesses.

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    KenseidenXL  over 3 years ago

    I want to do that to Jehovah’s Witlesses and Mor(m)ons….

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    Sanspareil  over 3 years ago

    LDS proselytizers become Modern Day Amphibians!

    It is the will of Landru!

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    BigDaveGlass  over 3 years ago

    What’s the matter you two, got a human in your throat?

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    Gent  over 3 years ago

    I never knews modern suit and tie was invented in the medieval ages.

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    Its just me  over 3 years ago

    Takes all the fun out of life not having them to insult.

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    jagedlo  over 3 years ago

    Wiz must have been in a good mood, he didn’t zap them into non-existence!

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    Doug Taylor Premium Member over 3 years ago

    My brother had the perfect response to door to door solicitors. He would answer the door naked!

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    Walrus Gumbo Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Just put up a sign that reads, “Proselytizers Will Be Sodomized”.

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    Doug K  over 3 years ago

    A “little” bit of an over-“reaction” on the part of the Wiz.

    He could probably benefit from hearing the “Good News”

    - just maybe not the way they were going to tell it.

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    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I wonder if you get a bonus blessing for being “frogged” while you’re witnessing? I suspect not, but you never know.

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    aerilim  over 3 years ago

    Jee-frog-a-witness…

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    Kaputnik  over 3 years ago

    I’ve never understood why people find this a difficult situation. I just say “please leave”, or words to that effect, and close the door. So far, all of them have left.

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    Pohka  over 3 years ago

    I need this for people soliciting for politicians and political causes.

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    Mario500  over 3 years ago

    (senses a cartoon with a story worthy of being serialized through other cartoons like this one)

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    donwalter  over 3 years ago

    …OH, I wish that I could do that…

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    Holilubillkori Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Yep…I found this funny! https://youtu.be/XVJIWl74Qbs

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    rshive  over 3 years ago

    Nice suits anyway.

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    bobbyferrel  over 3 years ago

    I’d give a small unspecified sum for one of those sticks.

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    scote1379 Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I usually say to "porch preachers " no thank you I am a Epicurean Stoic , The Gods are going to crap on you no matter what you do with your life so you might as well enjoy it !

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    squireobrien  over 3 years ago

    I’ve tried to cite Matthew 6 at them. Doesn’t seem to work.

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    Alberta Oil Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Going by the color of the jackets.. must have been JW’s. That stick the Wiz has would be handy for a weekend or two here.

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    pcmcdonald  over 3 years ago

    That’s how the Frogulite sect got started.

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    blakerl  over 3 years ago

    COVID-19 eliminated most door to door salesmen, but I still need help with Robot calls. Do they have a virus for them?

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    WCraft Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I’ll take them, any day, over those expressing their points of view in Portland and Minneapolis.

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    Curiosity Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Wish I could do that, especially to traveling proselytizers of all ilks

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    readfred  over 3 years ago

    My car needs repair! Whatever shall I do???

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    scaeva Premium Member over 3 years ago

    We used the “Dear, the virgins are here for the sacrifice,” line and haven’t seen one since.

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    cartbyjonathan  over 3 years ago

    Where’s the Wiz’s right arm in the first panel?

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    Charlie Fogwhistle  over 3 years ago

    Who needs to kiss them to turn them back into people?

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    BlueKnight1966  over 3 years ago

    Full suits, so probably JH, though they have a tendency to drag the whole family. I guess short sleeve white shirts and no jacket would have been a little on the nose, but still very funny.

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    l3i7l  over 3 years ago

    “Good news? I won? Where’s your van and the tv cameras? You guys are from Publishers Clearing House, aren’t you?”

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    paullp Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Wish I could do that trick. Best response I ever came up with to “Can we tell you the Good News?” was “Not at 9 AM on a Saturday morning, you can’t.” Then I firmly closed the door in their faces.

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    Plods with ...™  over 3 years ago

    Toadies never listen.

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    JesseLouisMartinez  over 3 years ago

    That’s what I wanna do to jehovah witnesses who come to my door

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    Lightpainter  over 3 years ago

    I usually just don’t answer the door. If you do answer, claim you “ have something on the stove”.

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    mfrasca  over 3 years ago

    There are many here among us

    Who feel that life is but a joke

    But you and I, we’ve been through that

    And this is not our fate

    So let us stop talkin’ falsely now

    The hour’s getting late

    - B. Dylan

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    WentBrown  over 3 years ago

    lol

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