Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for February 04, 2025

I do those, too, but don’t wear the shirt. The heroic part is when I wear the shirt with HER alma mater on it – my school’s arch rival.

I hope you didn’t do it in that order.

Umm. turning the sand in the cat box to glass with your heat vision. Doesn’t qualify as cleaning it.

Male superheroes are supposed to be role models for other men. But they see him more as a foe.

He’s not stupid. Because if he has to be asked to do it, then there’s going to be REAL trouble.

When my husbad retired, he got all up in my business and suddenly he was changing the way I did things around the house for 30 years.

Soon to be a widow if he doesn’t change…..

Actually doing those things make you a super hero.

Wow! Where’s the ticker-tape parade?

He cleaned the kitchen with Flash.

Between them, they did it in 5 seconds.

When your heroic Spandex can no longer ‘span’, consider rebranding to Mumu Man.

I’m doing laundry today. Where’s my medal?

Let’s hope he washed his paws between the tasks.

When you take care of your OWN kids, it’s not babysitting.

Too bad it won’t last.

I’m still confused on how cleaning the litter box became my responsibility.

Let’s keep politics off the comic page.

He won’t be making any more trips to the planet Krypton. Maybe just an occasional card game with Loki

been there done that. The wife was about as impressed as the cats were.

BUT did you take out the trash?

Did you expect a medal?

Now he needs an assistant.

The secret is to praise him anyway. He’s going through a rough time. This is a very confusing time.

My spouse and I have an agreement — I do the cats and he does the dogs. Our cats have all been rescues and we tend to have 2-4 at a time. Cats work better with a few friends to play with. My spouse has always carefully selected a purebred dog. We live in the country, so he has never had to worry about walking the dog or picking up the f.c.s. His only real responsibilities were feeding the dog, training the dog to go outside and taking it to the vet.

When our last wonderful dog passed away, he decided not to get another one. And so he started trying to befriend our cats. Now, our cats and dogs have always gotten along fine, even napping together, but they refuse to have anything to do with my spouse. We have been dogless for almost 4 years and none of cats will let him pet them, sit on his lap or even play when he dangles their favorite fishing-rod toy. They will take treats from him, eat the dry food if he fills the bowl [he won’t touch the canned], come in or go out when he opens the garage door for them; but that’s it.

Unfortunately, he emptied the litter into the dishwasher…

We don’t have a kitty, so no litterbox. When I retired, I just started loading and unloading the dishwasher without being asked. SWMBO complained the first couple times about how I did it but she relented when I said I was still waiting for her to honor her promise of mowing once a month.

I hope he washed his hands between the two…

Many years ago I went to a science fiction convention as Adequate Man

This happens even before retirement. My ex always thought he needed great praise for the rare times he ever did anything around the house. But me? That was my ‘job’. One of the many reasons he’s my ex. :D

So what, glad you got that covered. She probably cooks and clean without being asked.

The spandex tights hide the wrinkles.

Why does a husband need to have every task he performs be noticed? And why does every task require assistance or at least a witness? My version of the lightbulb riddle: How many husbands does it take to change a lightbulb?

We lots of inset ceiling lights. I realized long time ago that I was the only one who ever noticed when one burned out. And this is what would happen: Me: “The ceiling light in the bathroom burned out. Him: “Do we have any lightbulbs?” Me: Yes, they are on the top shelf in the laundry room [where they are always kept]. Him: “Are you sure?” Me: “Yes.” Him: He returns to reading or watching a show. Pause for commercial. Me: The ceiling light in the bathroom needs to be changed before we go to bed. Him: “Well, get me a bulb.” I get him a bulb and the stool and move it into position. He stands on the stool, unscrews the bulb and hands it to me. I hand him the new one. He screws it in and returns to his chair. I dispose of the burnt bulb, replace the stool and go back to cooking.

Many years ago in June, the light above my chair in the living room burned out. There were only 2 ceiling lights in that room, one over each chair. I decided to see how long it would be before he noticed and if he would actually do anything without me saying something. Nothing happened. The week before Thanksgiving [i.e., late November, 5 months after the first burn out] the bulb above his chair went out. He sat there a moment in the dark and then went into the den, unplugged the floor lamp, brought it in and set it up by his chair. I broke out laughing and said, “That’s your method for handling a completely dark room? To drag a light in set it up by your chair?” And he said, “Well, do we have any bulbs?”

My answer to the riddle above: It takes one husband and a wife who is willing to do all the prep work and cleanup and then praise the husband for doing the screwing-in.

Sometimes it is ok to tell what you have done, just to report that you did something, but you don’t always have to tell them

If you don’t announce it she will never notice.

Some things are obvious, such as emptying the dishwasher, and don’t need headlines. Some tasks need to be announced for a variety of reasons. Such as, “Honey, I cleared a path through the garage so you don’t have to around to the patio door just to get into the house.” See, a task like that would be appreciated but never expected.

Ohhhhahhhh, did he get a star on his to-do-list on the fridge???

Old superheroes never die…they just give the job to their kids.

And Superman does the housework at Super Speed

Yeah, but you smell weird ! ;-)

Wish my neighbors knew what a litter box was. :(

No matter how many chores he does, he won’t be loved as much as the cat.

This guy’s got the kind of belly you’d expect to see on a superhero. If they’re superstrong to start with, why would they need to work out to get a body-builder physique?

My husband is my super hero- he takes care of me too.

With his belly button sticking out his retirement adjustment period happened a long time ago.

I bet he even leaps tall trashbags in a single bound.

*Note to self: Empty the dishwasher first, then clean out the litter box!

Yeah? You want a brownie button for that?

“Honeybunches, I haven’t run the dishwasher yet.”

Obviously, he’s avoiding working on the memoir that would pay for their retirement. Only way housework gets done, often.

I hope not in that order!

I think a standing ovation is in order here.

And I did it all for you.