Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 03, 2024

Throw in “No lies” and “No acts of treason” and you’ve got my vote.

I have 6 places with great pizza in a 15 minute radius and I don’t want to be hugged by strangers.

Does the Constitution say the President has to be human?

My fear with Pig running would be that the smart people would vote for Pig, and we all know how many idiots there are in the world (USA) to vote for the dictator want to be.

At least Pig have a clean record and is younger than the two real candidates.

I would vote for Pig!

you got my vote!

I could happily live the rest of my life without pizza. Unless I started to think about missing one. Of course, I never even heard of pizza until I was in my 20s. Hugs not so much.

Pig 2024!!

Seems more like an ad for Papa Johns.

I’m voting for Pig. I’m not sure he’s smart enough to lie, and treason is too much work.

What about Rat? He ran for President in 96, so he has more experience than Pig! And there shouldn’t be such big rivalries in the same house!

Better than any of the current options!

Nailed it!

So it going to be Pig vs Rat this year eh.

That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever heard.Pizza is just fine

If you have pineapple on the pizza, then Rat won’t vote for you (and neither will I).

Looks like Pig’s definition of basic needs is better pizza, more hugs. I think we can all agree on those two points. :)

I had pizza last night, and hugs are great! I’m with you Pig!

Great prank!

Better pizza and health care!

Read “Poorcraft”: Get a head start….

Taylor Swift 2024

If you really want the votes, change that to More Ammo, Higher Capacity MAGAzines…too subtle?

As long as it’s thin crust

Mandatory Taco Tuesdays!

I like the idea that the purpose of our government should be to serve and protect its citizens.

More hugs (and kisses) was/is a huge part of Dopey Joe’s agenda but The Ministry of Truth has worked hard to redact all existing footage of it.

The Pig is already running in 2024.

I’ll never run for office. It’s too boring and political.

Pig will only win if he is descended from a Plantagenet because only Plantagenets have ever won the US president elections.

Stephan Pasties for president 2024.

Ironically, one of our 2024 candidates wants better pizza (& hamburders) and the other one wants more hugs.

I vote for that

I like Pig’s election promises.

At least one thing has cheese.

I would vote for Pig. He’s better than… other presidents.

Pig will have to work on alternate sources of pizza ham, Canadian bacon, pepperoni, and sausage. Everyone expects the president to sacrifice too much.

Man, some of you are just cold hearted. Those b****ing and moaning about government “welfare” and handouts might consider the following:

Supplemental Security Income (SSI) – Provides cash payments to disabled, repeat, disabled children, disabled adults, and persons over 65 who are citizens or nationals of the United States.

Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) – provides food benefits to low-income families to supplement their grocery budget so they can afford the nutritious food essential, repeat, essential to health .

The Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) provides federal grants to states for supplemental foods, health care referrals, and nutrition education for low-income pregnant, breastfeeding, and non-breastfeeding postpartum women, and to infants and children up to age 5 who are found to be at nutritional risk.

The Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) program provides states and territories with flexibility in operating programs designed to help low-income families with children achieve economic self-sufficiency. States use TANF to fund monthly cash assistance payments to low-income families with children, as well as a wide range of services.

It seems to me that these programs are providing help to the disabled, those in need of food assistance, and low income families with children who are hurting. I have no problem with using my tax dollars for these purposes and, to me, this is exactly what government should be doing instead of giving tax breaks to billionares and corporations who do not need that type of government “welfare”.

Boomer, liberal, and proud of it.

most popular candidate since Pat Paulson

Let’s have pig start a new party!!!

Good for you, Pig! This world would be a better place if more humans could focus on what’s really important.

I can see it now: “What caused the end of the Pig Party: somebody asked him what he meant by ‘better pizza’.”

I’d vote for him.

Where does Pig stand on pork barrel spending?

I VOTE FOR PIG!

That won’t work because this generation is more concerned with global warming caused by pizza ovens.

But will he hug the flag?

Is Alfred E. Newman running for President this year?

I think I’d prefer more pizza and better hugs.

Pig joins a whole string of cartoon characters who ran, including Pogo [“I Go Pogo”] and even “Krazy Kat” who once threw their “Het” in the “Ring”.

Depends, what pizza place will provide?

Always good to turn a venue for short-form amusement into a demented and futile political rant arena. Well done, everyone.

Two things that make life worth living. The basics just keep you alive.

I’m in! I’ll vote dozens of times.

I’d vote for pig any day. He is so sweet!

Every individual is personally responsible for their own basic needs.

Only Socialists and Communists RELY on the Government for basic needs.

We could use more hugs.

Pig as President and Goat as his Chief of Staff. That would improve the world.

Pig got my vote! :)

Change “more hugs” to “free beer” and you might have a viable platform!

Good luck with that. Likely GOP responses:“Better pizza would mean a Big Government takeover of your pizza. Do you want some bureaucrat telling you what kind of pizza you can eat? They’ll have to take my greasy thin crust pizza from my cold dead fingers! It’s a psyop by the liberal woke pizza mob to make you eat fancy overpriced pizza with arugula on it!!” Ted Cruz will push an image on social media of a pizza with a gun on top of it and the slogan “come and take it!” Faux News will warn that it’s an attempt to get illegal alien pizza through our borders and poison our blood with communist cheese.

As for “more hugs”: “woke transsexual groomers want to touch our children!!!!!!”

Also Taylor Swift Hunter Biden’s laptop George Soros Rothschild Space Lasers.

What’s interesting here is that even Pig has his priorities. I wonder who doesn’t.

Amazing how so many likes are showing up from account’s that haven’t been active for months.

Pig, I like the way you think ♥

Well, Pig has zero experience as a public servant, so he’s right up MAGA’s alley

Uh, Pig?

Are you aware that they put bacon, ham and sausage on pizzas?

Who are you, Patrick McDonnell?

I may have to vote for a third party this year, we could all use more hugs.

B.S.

How and where do I cast my vote for you, Pig?

You had me at pizza, you lost me at hugs. Eww, stay away from me, random people.