Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 31, 2024

Rat is a real motherducker.

I have several questions…

Mom is wondering what the duck.

However one wonders about Rat’s parents. Kids learn what they live.

Does she eat duck eggs?

To fail correctly can be a success.

Send her Lil’ Guard Duck. THAT’LL settler her hash!

Well done Rat.

You’re quite the conniver, Rat!

I assume he didn’t send her Guard Duck?

in the midwest, there is a weed called Goat’s Head, or “Texas Tacks”, with a 4-part cluster of vicious little foot-stabbing barbs, each section of which sprouts in a different year. my sister discovered ducks love to eat them, and keeps a pair for her yard. you’re welcome.

Rat misunderstood her instruction whenever he visits.

“Duck please.”

Rat had all of his ducks in a row.

Rat thinks it’s a joke. He quacks himself up.

You’re despicable!

This is a perfect example of passive-aggressive behavior.

Give Rat credit for the playing the long game.

… so if you want to duck out of having to give presents …

Useful for playing “DUCK, DUCK, GOOSE”.

I gave some friends a couple of ducklings once. They got in the creek and swam away, never to be seen again :(

Rat always has a plan. World dominance is out of the question so he will just send a duck.

“When the duck comes down with the magic word and the word is ‘food’, we ate him,”

Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck …. GOOSE!

My daughter will appreciate this strip—her fiancé’s daughter sent them a live hermit crab starter kit for Christmas.

You didn’t give her Guard Duck, did you?

People use this strategy. But usually it’s with a fruit cake.

Aren’t ducks all operated by remote control? Where’s your clicker, Rat.

Rat and The❤️Count ❤️ it when a Plan Comes Together! God Bless America!

Ooooh rat, you sly little demon!!!

And if she throws one at you, the first thing you will say is:

DUCK.

Rat could have gifted his mom’s presents to Guard Duck, who could have created a company of security-minded waterfowl.

So what has Mrs. Rat been doing with the ducks? I hope she’s found them good homes.

If this is the guard duck she should feel safe.

Reminds me all the Chinese restaurants will be open

Rat’s ducked that responsibility.

I think his Mother has a bad attitude…

His mother is a vegetarian rat?

That’s just Daffy.

In other words, “Duck You!”.

Boy, your mother sure got down.

If Rat sent all of the ducks in a crate, she’d have a box of quackers.

At least Rat has a mom to send a gift too.

p.s. send me your AmEX Centurion card number so I can buy something useful.

We don’t hear much about Rat’s mother. They clearly don’t get along.

Now, where did I put Goosey-Goosey-Gander?

Is that where Guard Duck has been for the last few years?

He should have sent a goose for the third year.

The Duck can guard the house.

When I was learning to golf, I hit a horrible shot that hit a duck.

In my defense, it didn’t duck.

(It was knocked out but seemed fine after a couple of minutes.)

My beagle will happily take the duck if it’s cut into pieces and dehydrated. I bought her some duck jerky and if I grab a piece for her she puts herself trough training mode paces in anticipation. She would stand on her head for duck jerky. The live ones, she ignores.

I guess Rat doesn’t like his family all too much.

Not a surprise, I’ll be honest.

leave it to Rat…

“Why a duck?”

I would love to have Runner Ducks! We had 4 or 5 when we lived in Western Washington & they patrolled the yard every morning & event searching for bugs. They loved the slugs. They didn’t bother the garden plants, but kept them pest free.

I have a visual of a rat trying to put wrapping paper on a duck.

And it took only five years.

The duck stops here

I guess the comments make it clear: It’s Duck Season!

Mothers accomplish their own with so little credit, and succeed.

Rat has successfully ducked another obligation.

Slow but sure.

I’ve never quite understood why ducks are funny, but there is no question that they are. Maybe because they walk around mumbling all the time?

Okay, but there are better ways to have achieved that one.

In the Pearls universe a live duck is a second to none home security system. Maybe Rat’s concerned for her safety.

Of course, Guard Duck is also a fully sentient and self-aware individual. If that’s true of all ducks, does that mean Rat’s taking part in some kind of slave trade?

My mom used to send me a check for Christmas and I’d send her a gift card. Finally, years ago we agreed that was silly and now only send a card.

Thought rats ate anything!

Much like Obama and crazy Joe. They gave us nothing useful either.

Gotcha! Now if they could only figure it out with underwear!

I REALLY want to show this to two friends. I just got rid of at least 10 coffee mugs. I don’t even drink the stuff. What did I get from one of them? A coffee mug.