Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for February 10, 2025

What a tool.

When all else fails, read the instructions.

Maybe he learned the wrong lesson from the Relics Star Trek TNG episode when Scotty told Laforge while they were fixing the impulse engine it was okay to ignore the starship manual on that occasion.

The difference between Scotty and the dearly departed is, Scotty knew what he was doing.

So many manuals these days, read like they were translated from Mandarin by someone who is only fluent in Cantonese and English. Then someone else translates it into French and Spanish.

Typical male, never asks for directions!

More than just one screw loose…

He might still be with us, if he hadn’t bought that book “Sewing Your Own Parachute For Dummies”.

“RTFM” isn’t even a thing any longer, far as I can see. Duckduckgo the description of your current problem then watch the youtube videos that explain how to fix/build/update it.

We do keep our paper instruction sheets for things like the dishwasher and water heater, and I do use them in preference to a web search, but I’m kinda old fashioned.

The king is dead, long live the king.

It would be ironic if his name was ‘Manuel’.

He made a grave mistake.

Every once in a while you read a story that makes you happy for MAGAt stupidity.

Researchers from Yale University who studied the pandemic’s effects on those two states say that from the pandemic’s start in March 2020 through December 2021, “excess mortality was significantly higher for Republican voters than Democratic voters after COVID-19 vaccines were available to all adults, but not before.” -AP. 7/25/23

Remember – science is a liberal conspiracy rubes!

He didn’t not read the manual the right way.

Ah, he missed the part where it either said disconnect the battery or turn off the power before getting started.

My oldest grandson was a born engineer. Long before he learned to read he would put things together by what he called “reading the constructions”.

Y-chromosome strikes again!

Put tab K into slot 12 making not to cutting of fingers…

I didn’t watch the game, did the orange bandito wear his “going to a football game” suit?

Strangely, my honey will watch bits of it. Then I get the report the next morning. I should ask her about the suit.

RTFM

Anyone else remember the Mash episode where Trapper John is trying to defuse a bomb and Blake is reading the instructions — and turning the page too slowly. […."But first, remove the fuse.]

He would have utter contempt for me. If it comes with a manual, I read it. But increasingly often these days, the paper manual is inadequate, and if it’s not something really simple, I may have to go online and look for somebody’s how-to video.

A guy who starts out never reading the manual is a guy who has a spirit of adventure. One can only hope he doesn’t cross a wire or set his vehicle on fire, thus becoming another kind of spirit.

I usually use the manual to prop the shop door open.

I once worked for a company that developed computer programs for the U. S. and Korean armed forces.

The computer manuals were interesting. They were mostly Hangul (Korean- which is a phonetic alphabet) but when they came to some technical term that Hangul could not handle, they switched to Chinese. When that failed, they went to English.

So you read a bunch of Hangul squiggles then transition to Chinese ideograms and all of a sudden the word “disk drive” shows up.

It was interesting designing a database that worked in both English and Hangul – it all depended on a numerical primary key.

I learned how to write WordPerfect macros by reading the manual.

He read the Green New Deal agenda.

My vacuum cleaner has the best owner’s manual I’ve ever used with great trouble-shooting tips.

In the old days, it was a challenge to read schematics and troubleshoot circuits from Asian made manufacturers. English and symbols were in the learning phase for them.

“Is it supposed to do that?”

mourners standing around an empty grave is just wrong.

With some of the manuals I have seen, you are better off guessing!

Tim: we hadn’t knew you!

Death by power tools eh ;-)

Yeah, like reading the Constitution…

There are no manuals anymore, just picture diagrams in every language

We had an International Cub mower for many years. Dad and my brother were always having to stop because the mower belt had come loose because of sweet gum balls. When I took over the task, that stopped happening. The manual told how to tighten the belt. The fix took five minutes. A win for the girl.

“of course I checked that electricity is off. I’m not stupid.”

His throne had some parts left over after assembly.

It’s always that last bolt that does you in.

My dad, who never did anything that required RTFM that he couldn’t get someone else to do by any means possible, once told me, “But I don’t like reading the instructions.”

Is suicide the ultimate DIY, or would that be doing surgery on yourself to save your own life?

Re dumbing down of the general public: Car manual from 50 years ago told you how to replace the valves; car manual of today warns you not to drink the battery fluid.

He got hammered, then screwed up.

I guess it’s saying the bleedin’ obvious that a lot of men don’t like asking for directions. I remember once being pulled over by a couple in a car, where the wife asked me how to get to a particular convention centre; I’d been there before, and I said “Well, for a start, you’re on the wrong side of the (Sydney) Harbour.” She replied, through gritted teeth, “I THOUGHT SO!!” I put them straight, but the poor sap sitting next to her was wishing that the floor would open up just then and make him disappear. As far as I know, they did not die on the way.

Darwin award winner.