Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 18, 2024

  1. Ding a ling
    BasilBruce  5 months ago

    Maybe he just doesn’t like nuts and bolts; some guys are more into wood.

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    The Premium Member 5 months ago

    This was more shocking when they did it over in “Hi & Lois.”

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    MichaelAxelFleming  5 months ago

    The Crocs would’ve been here, but Stephan had a reptile dysfunction.

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    hariseldon59  5 months ago

    I doubt that it’s very hard.

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    194919671982  5 months ago

    Must be for men whose prostate is prostrate.

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member 5 months ago

    “Showoff!”

    “Throw a towel over it!”

    “Do some pushups, Pablo, it’ll go away.”

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    Imagine  5 months ago

    Now there are little blue pills.

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    i_am_the_jam  5 months ago

    “…el mejor juguete es Exim…Exim……Exim………Exim…”

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    Walter Kocker  5 months ago

    There’s a hotel in Skagway, Alaska called, “Morning Wood”.

    Catchy name, hard to forget. Good marketing.

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    jtrevor99  5 months ago

    I dunno; the censor’s response is rather flaccid.

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    MathProf2  5 months ago

    Cartoonists have to deal with some stiff regulations.

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    DangerBunny  5 months ago

    Cheap as they are, Richard jokes are still worth a chuckle.

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    Sanspareil  5 months ago

    That guy just stiffed them!

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    Zykoic  5 months ago

    Yeah, I had one when I was a kid in the 50s. Always was losing the nuts. I was reminiscing at work last week to the younger office workers. I got funny looks from the ladies when I tried to explain it. They called HR. HR got it all straight for them. Miss that toy. I wish I had one now.

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    lavender headgear  5 months ago

    A truck containing a shipment of Viagra has been hijacked. Police are on the lookout for a gang of hardened criminals.

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    jonnytest  5 months ago

    Oooohhhh! Dirty! You have a potty-pen, Stephan.

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    iggyman  5 months ago

    Erector set, by A.C. Gilbert, I had one, great fun and a learning toy!

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    rekam  5 months ago

    See what you started, Stephan?

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    cmerb  5 months ago

    Some years ago there was a Motel in East Detroit Michigan that had a Mexican man puling a donkey by leash and the story was to " bring your own A$$ " : )

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    pokeystick  5 months ago

    I’m sorry Stephen but this one is dumb and I don’t think adults should be allowed to read it.

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    Sephten  5 months ago

    Max Miller joke:—‘Dad, is it hard to please a woman?’‘It is if it’s not, son!’

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    Serial Pedant  5 months ago

    Pushing your limits, there, Stephan.

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    cdward  5 months ago

    Looks like I came late. All the good puns are already gone.

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    smoore47  5 months ago

    Enis Penvy

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    Lenavid  5 months ago

    Actually, the censor was rather soft on him.

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    kaycstamper  5 months ago

    FB wouldn’t allow it. They don’t all anything if you catch them on a bad day. Never get back to your dispute either.

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    gozirra2 Premium Member 5 months ago

    For all the men reminiscing that they “had one years ago”, there are medications to relive the joy.

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    Keno21  5 months ago

    Should drop a Lincoln Log on him.

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    gawaintheknight  5 months ago

    Things can be erected a lot faster if you have friends to play with.

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    wrd2255  5 months ago

    Heh heh. Beavis, he said “hard”.

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    Frank Salem Premium Member 5 months ago

    I used to get hard semi-annually. Now I get semi-hard annually.

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    tvm6060  5 months ago

    Lincoln Logs

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    Differentname  5 months ago

    Every once in a while I’ll think about the toys I saw back in the 1960s. Aurora had models of a guillotine and a rack, plus a tiny Vampirella. My 007 attaché case had a little plastic throwing knife. The Honey West doll came with tiny handcuffs.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 5 months ago

    ED can be a terrible thing. Help stop Erector set Deniers.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 5 months ago

    Probably not, Stephan. Probably not… :.(

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    [Traveler] Premium Member 5 months ago

    Stephan is mechanically inclined. He screws up everything

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    Denver Reader Premium Member 5 months ago

    Come again? What is he trying to say?

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    Ellis97  5 months ago

    Like most people these days (myself included), that censor guy is gonna die single.

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    SquidGamerGal  5 months ago

    Ugh! People just get so offended these days…

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    asmbeers  5 months ago

    Steve must be feeling the pressure.

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    elbow macaroni  5 months ago

    Childish

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    uniquename  5 months ago

    Good gravy folks! Get your minds out of the gutter!

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    Slowly, he turned...  5 months ago

    I don’t care what he does – this is funny!

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    Goat from PBS  5 months ago

    The CSC is back! Here to interrupt everything edgy.

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    Spoonbone  5 months ago

    I have a bone to pick with this subject matter.

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    ladykat Premium Member 5 months ago

    I was jealous of the boys next door when I was small. They got erector sets, I was stuck with paper dolls.

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    Queen of America  5 months ago

    That last panel had me cracking up!

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    Thomas R. Williams  5 months ago

    The C-S-Censor’s response is so flaccid he would never get his leg over the line to any happy ending.

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    aerotica69  5 months ago

    We never had an erector set, but we did have miles and miles of Hotwheels track and a super-charger.

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    Snoopy Copter  5 months ago

    Im going to make a comment that will offend a lot of people: OHIO STATE IS BETTER THAN MICHIGAN!!!

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    Jeffin Premium Member 5 months ago

    Throw a towel over it.

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    Jeffin Premium Member 5 months ago

    At least it’s not a set of Lincoln logs.

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  53. Odin
    Holden Awn  5 months ago

    The censor must of spotted his “For a Good Time, See Alice” sign…

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    IndyW  5 months ago

    I still have, including the books and case, and played with my dad’s set, that he purchased in the 1950’s. Hours of building and many screws and nuts. :-) (tee hee)!

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    rshive  5 months ago

    Erector sets had small pieces that children could swallow. That’s a no-no in today’s world. Lincoln Logs were always cool. Wonder if they’re still available.

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    FestoNrwlk  5 months ago

    WOW a lot of lead in the pencils coming out of the wood work

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    brooklyn51  5 months ago

    Oh, just zip it up!

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    FireAnt_Hater  5 months ago

    Haven’t seen Comic Strip Censor in a while. Glad to see him! Funny!

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  59. Booby
    Snolep  5 months ago

    The original dad joke.

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    christelisbetty  5 months ago

    Confession: I chuckle when I pass the billboard for Snap On Tools.

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    ChessPirate  5 months ago

    Sheldon Cooper : Now, back to our game.

    Raj Koothrappali : You were in the middle of an erection.

    Sheldon Cooper : Oh, of course! It’s right here in my hand.

    Sheldon Cooper : I want to build a road, but I need wood. Either of you fellows have wood?

    [Raj and Howard snicker]

    Sheldon Cooper : I don’t understand the laughter. The object of “Settlers of Catan” is to build roads and settlements. To do so requires wood. Now I have sheep; I need wood. Who has wood for my sheep?

    Sheldon Cooper : Now, where were we? Oh, yes. Does anyone have any wood?

    [Raj and Howard laugh]

    Sheldon Cooper : Oh, come on! I just want wood! Why are you making it so hard?

    [Raj and Howard laugh harder]

    Sheldon Cooper : And now that I have some wood, I’m going to begin the erection of my settlements.

    Raj Koothrappali : [sotto, to Wolowitz] He’s got to be doing this on purpose.

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    chriscc63  5 months ago

    Bwaaa, he did it in the end anyway. ha ha

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    Radish...   5 months ago

    The strips are going blue these days.

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    kendavis09  5 months ago

    The B.C. dictionary says it’s what you buy if you have E.D.

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    Richard S Russell Premium Member 5 months ago

    Ba-da-BOOM!

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    ChazNCenTex  5 months ago

    Maybe some lubricant will help.

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  67. Pussyhatpig
    TheWildSow  5 months ago

    I once followed a truck that had this sign: Precast Concrete Erection.

    I thought that sounded kinda painful – and did it last more than 4 hours?!

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  68. Boris badenov
    BeBadenov Premium Member 5 months ago

    You have no shame, Mr. Pastis. :-)

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  69. Nowyoulisten
    zeexenon  5 months ago

    Flaccid if you’re lucky with a full bladder on a freezing day at 81.

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  70. Mok
    mokspr Premium Member 5 months ago

    Hey, HEY! Don’t get on the Censor’s case…he’s just another working stiff!

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    jimboklein  5 months ago

    I, for one, am getting tired of all this news about the Presidential erection. I mean, don’t we have enough statues of Presidents? Do we REALLY need to erect more statues of President?

    (with a tip of the hat to the late, great Gilda Radnor)

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    Dapperdan61  Premium Member 5 months ago

    This comic left me in stitches. Well played Pastis

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    KEA  5 months ago

    I had trouble with kids keeping a straight face when I was teaching optics and describing images as inverted or erect.

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    Snoopy_Fan  5 months ago

    I just think it sounds like Ed may be the problem…

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima Premium Member 5 months ago

    You inadvertently pulled a b0ner, Rat.

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    JoeMartinFan Premium Member 5 months ago

    Last panel: That’s what she said!

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    pamela welch Premium Member 5 months ago

    Stephan, Stephan … tsk, tsk — LOLOL

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    tvstevie  5 months ago

    Erect means hard, all right.

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    willie_mctell  5 months ago

    The kids across the street had one with a motor.

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    Bilan  5 months ago

    Erector sets were around about the time comics were meant for kids.

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    skinny robotnik  5 months ago

    Pastis really needs to bring back Zeeba.

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    Eric S   5 months ago

    it was a rousing conversation

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    MitchellTimin  5 months ago

    snicker, snicker …..

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    Rocky Premium Member 5 months ago

    Pastis, you have out-done yourself with this one. Excellent!

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    eddi-TBH  5 months ago

    Pastis got his point across.

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    unfair.de  5 months ago

    I always suspected people making a calling out of censoring must have had as seriously lacking childhood.

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    Charlie Fogwhistle  5 months ago

    At my age, I don’t see well anymore. What’s that sign on the hat of the bossy guy say? Looks like “John Shirley” or something like that.

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    azardoz  5 months ago

    Brilliant strip !

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    azardoz  5 months ago

    No doubt the companies behind those names, logos, & mottoes were quite aware of the double entendres. Probably increased business.

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    PAR85  5 months ago

    You can’t call Pastis soft, he continued on even after being told the strip was over.

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    MarthaGwen Premium Member 5 months ago

    The Christmas I was in the 5th grade, I got both a doll and an erector set. I requested the erector set and one of my grandmothers gave me the doll, since she thought I was too much of a “tomboy.” I built all sorts of things with that erector set and passed it on to my younger brother who did the same.

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