Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 16, 2024

That’s why I’m going to cremated. I’m not letting the dirt get me!

We have a lot to do with still being alive.

Happy Birthday, Steph. I just celebrated my 65th a few days ago. Nice to know that you’re a fellow Capricorn.

Sweet! Thanks, Stephan!!!! My birthday is in just over two weeks and I’m going to save this to post!

Did Rat steal Stephan’s mug?

You can run, but you can’t hide. ::sigh::

I figured he’d congratulate Steph on not being killed for one of his puns…yet.

Bill Bailey has a version called Your Meaningless Milestone of Decay. It’s on YouTube.

What, no cake?

Happy Birthday Steph!

Happy birthday, Stephan! I’ve been reading PBS from the day Scott Adams recommended it on the Dilbert page centuries ago (using a word I don’t quite remember but it amounted to something like “very comicesque”) and still enjoy it. Keep it up, and many greetings from Germany!

Birthdays: Marking the chronological order of decay!

Between this strip and “Rabbits Against Magic” from last Thursday, my self-esteem is shot for the month. >

Well you no give him birthday cake to eats. So obviously he no like you.

Happy Birthday Stephan.

I would buy this as a birthday card.

Rat should go into the next superhero drama. Instant supervillain right there!

Happy Birthday, Stephan!

Happy Birthday, Steph.

Happy Birthday. Your fans are all older than you, will die before you, and none will remember you in their will.

Happy birthday, Steph, and thanks for the laughs!

Father Time is undefeated.

Happy Birthday, Steph! Hope it’s grand!

He will have to wait an extra day for his next birthday.

lmao

Rat’s way of spreading the joy.

Had a “friend” who’d tell you on your birthday, “Despite everything you’ve learned, know, say or do you have moved, inexorably, a year closer to your death.”

At first I thought this was a really late new years strip.

Happy Birthday, Steph. Thanks for the laughs.

If Stephan is able to survive until his next birthday next year, he will have managed another 366 days breathing and above the dirt.

If we measured age by the time it takes the solar system to orbit the Milky Way, rather than the Earth around the sun, I’d be roughly 0.000000226 years old (using the Earth around the sun year as the benchmark.)

Please invite the Crocs to your party.

@StephanPastis Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday, Stephan.

You are an exhausting individual, Rat.

The❤️Count is going to have to remember that one. Make a cool beans birthday card.

Happy Birthday, Steph. Have a great day and thanks for the laughs.

Happy Still Above the Dirt Day!

Once a year we celebrate with stupid hats and plastic plates, the fact that you were able to make another trip around the sun, happy birthday, now you’re one year older (the happy birthday song of a local radio show)

¡FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOS, STEPH!

\(ᵔ⍢ᵔ)/

Happy Birthday Stephan!

Happy birthday, Stephan. Hope you have a great big day.

Happy birthday, Stephan Pastis.

Happy birthday, Steph! Wishing you many more! (puns)

Congratulations on not losing your gravitational attraction and being flung off the Earth for another trip around the sun!

I’m an earth sign. I’m thinking mulch.

Well then don’t say “Congrats”. Just say “Happy Birthday”.

Happy Birthday Stephan!

Many years ago, a friend whose birthday was a day after mine walked up to me and said “Just remember, when you turn 100, I’ll still only be 99.” Simply turned, and walked away.

Is this a subtle way of letting us all know it’s your birthday? Don’t expect any presents from me!

The worms go in, the worms go out…..

That’s a unique way of saying Happy Birthday.

Happy birthday like everyone else.

Happy birthday to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

I’m now at the age where if I don’t keep moving they’ll throw dirt on me!

Memento mori, Stephan.

A little different perspective.

Happy Birthday!

Better than pushing daisies! ☺️☺️

I want my remains to be scattered all over the beach, and I don’t want to be cremated.

Remember man thou art but dust and unto dust thou shalt return. Genesis 3:19.

Happy Birthday Stephan Pastis. Waiting for you to return to Wichita for another book tour.

It’s ain’t over at death.

Happy Birthday, mirth maker!!!

Greetings to Steph as he celebrates the trigintaquinquennium of his 21st birthday!

I get that this is a comic and not an animation, but I still like when there is something happening and today’s strip is just lazy.Frame 1 and 4 are identical apart from a cup oddly missing in frame 4, so is frame 2 and 3 with the exception of Rats arms/hands and legs/feet.

Happy 56th Birthday, Cartoon Boy!

But just know that Rat is right. As it says in Scripture, “…you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” (Genesis 3.19, RSV)

Congratulations on another successful circumnavigation of our local star!

Quick! Be cremated before that, too, is the primary cause of Global Warming. Plus, your ashes will be great for our garden.

Happy Birthday, Stephan Pastis!

https://Www.youtube.Com/watch?v=3nm37gzDnk0

It’s your Birthday, oh Happy Birthday…one day closer to DEATH!

Most rats live in a hole in the ground.

Congratulations on maintaining orbit!

Happy, happy birthday! Have a wonderful day!

Happy Birthday, Stephen! (And many more.)

Happy Birthday!!!!

Happy Birthday, S. P.

That’s why this year is more challenging for you. Now you have to survive for 366 days… Good luck! :D :P

>GASP!< And to his own FATHER!!! (Technically, Stephen is all the animals’ father AND mother!)

Happy birthday, Steph!

Happy Birthday Stephan. Love the comics!

Happy Birthday Stephen! Greetings from Washington DC!

unfortunately he’s right, tho…

Hope your day is a blast! Go somewhere and BE A KID AGAIN. ignore all these Debbie Downers. I celebrate another year of your hilarious, insightful comic! Please come to Comic Con some year.

Great one! HBD to you!

Happy Birthday, Stephan! You share a birthday with markkahler52! ME!

Live long, and prosper.

Ooh Happy Birthday!!

HIPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >

Happy birthday, Mr. Pastis.

Occasionally I think about buying a lakebed or peat bog or something and selling burial plots there. I’d do it in a way that maximizes the chances of the body fossilizing, and market it to people who like the idea of paleontologists in the distant future using their remains to study the human population of our era.

Happy birthday!

Happy(?) birthday, sir.

“If you’re reading this letter, my disease has run its course. Enclosed is some money for my burial. I would like to be cremated. I spent my whole life in a box. I don’t want to be buried in one.” Georgia May Byrd in Last Holiday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY STEPHAN!

That’s still better than the anonymous card Pastis got—-“Thank the Lord that you’re not a Mayfly”

Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday Stephan !!!

Happy Birthday Stephan!!!

You load 16(hundred)puns, and what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt……

Today is also our dog’s (#HoudiniTheMagicShihPoo) whelp-day. (I learned that word from Snoopy). He is 11 years old today!

Happy birthday to you Steph! I remember meeting you at a book signing in Pasadena. You signed two books, one for me and the other for my now late pastor. We would have discussions about your Sunday strips after Sunday morning services. He always hated your puns with the long setup.

My favorite strip of yours was the one where you paid tribute to your late father-in-law.

Happy Birthday Stephan!

Happy Birthday, Steph! Pearls is my favorite strip…it used to be tied with Dilbert, but since Adams was “canceled” you are #1!!

Has Rat given any thought to his own fate once the dirt claims Steph?

Happy Birthday Stephan ♫♪♫

(Sung to the tune of “The Volga Boatmen.”)

Happy Birthday! [Huhn!] Happy Birthday! [Hunh!]

So you’ve aged another year,

Now you know that death is near.

Happy Birthday! [Huhn!] Happy Birthday! [Hunh!]

Happy Birthday! [Huhn!] Happy Birthday! [Hunh!]

Death, destruction, and despair,

People dying everywhere.

Happy Birthday! [Huhn!] Happy Birthday! [Hunh!]

————————

I could go on, but I won’t. Happy birthday, Stephan!

I wonder if Stephan will read all of these happy birthday messages, sure hope so. Anyway, from Mexico City to wherever you are, ¡Feliz cumpleaños, maestro!

Happy birthday, Stephan.

Happy Birthday! And may your new year be blessed with many new ideas for your good comics which I enjoy every day.

Happy Birthday W-A-OTH, since goldilocks comics wouldn’t let me post your real name

happy birthday, stephan!

And a Happy Tuesday to you too, Rat.

The dirt will have you since you will be it.

Thanks! Today’s my birthday!

Happy birthday Stephan Thomas Pastis

Happy Birthday, Stephan. Thanks for “Pearls”. : )

Yo! Happy birthday, Cartoon-Boy. I do rather admire Rat’s eloquence, though….

He must root for the Detroit Tigers!

Happy Birthday Steph! May you stay above the ground for a lot longer.

Happy Dirt Day, Stephan.

M. Pastis, use this strip to make your own holiday card series or Hallmark will beat you to it!

I think it’s still superior to being pickled and jarred in a polished wooden container.